Do Gym and Shirtless Photos Help on Dating Apps? What the Data Says, and How to Show You Are Fit Without the Flex

Should you put a gym selfie or a shirtless photo on your dating profile? If you are a man trying to match with women, the answer is almost always no. Survey after survey and the one big app data set we have say it costs you matches. But here is the part most advice skips: being fit still matters a lot. Studies find that how strong a man's body looks explains most of how attractive his body seems. The problem is not your body. It is the flex. Here is what the research shows, where the rules flip, and how to show you are in shape without looking like you only care about that.

What the data says about shirtless photos

App data: In 2020, Dating.com compared what its users said with what happened in its apps. Men with a shirtless photo got about 25% fewer matches, even though 90% of men thought it would help. 66% of women said shirtless photos looked immature.
An experiment: A 2022 study in Sex Roles showed 567 US college students a fake Tinder profile of the same average looking man. When he was muscular and shirtless, women rated him lower in competence and social appeal. Both men and women rated him as more likely to take sexual risks.
A survey: In a 2025 survey of 1,200 singles by the dating app Wisp, gym photos were a red flag for 61% of women and 59% of men. Bathroom mirror selfies bothered 42% of women.
Newer work: A Kennesaw State researcher said in February 2026 that in his photo study, women judging men's profiles looked for signs of kindness and reliability, and photos with dogs or travel did well for men.

Each of these has limits. Company surveys are not peer reviewed, and the Sex Roles study used one man in one photo set. But they all point the same way, and none of them found the shirtless shot helping straight men.

Where the rules flip

The rule is not the same for everyone.

Women: The same 2020 Dating.com data found women with a bikini photo were about 40% more likely to get matches. The double standard is real.
Gay and bi men: Queer men were four times more likely to use a shirtless photo in that data. A Grindr survey of UK users in June 2026 found nearly three in four were more likely to start a chat with someone who had a "thirst trap" photo, and bedroom mirrors and gym changing rooms were among the top spots for those shots. So a photo that hurts with women can help with men.

That flip shows up in real life. A bisexual man in late October 2026 said 99% of his likes were from men. His female friends told him to remove his one gym photo.

Why being fit still matters

Do not read this as "your body does not matter." It matters a lot.

A 2017 study in Proceedings of the Royal Society B found that how strong a man's upper body looked explained more than 70% of how attractive his body was rated. Add height and leanness and it reached 80%. The strongest looking men were rated the most attractive in every sample.
A 2007 study in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found something more mixed. Women rated muscular men as sexier, but also as more volatile and less committed. Moderately muscular men were rated most attractive overall.

Put together, women notice a fit body and like it. But a photo that puts your body first sends a second message: that you care most about how you look. In the 2007 study, more muscle also read as less committed, and a shirtless selfie stacks those two signals on top of each other.

New research (September 2026)

A preprint posted on Sept 3, 2026 looked at 706 men in three countries. Men who believed women like bigger muscles wanted to be more muscular and trained harder for it. In a second test with 512 men, the researchers showed men social media posts that made women seem to want either very muscular men or "dad bods" and skinny guys. Men's ideal body shifted toward whatever women seemed to want. The study has not been peer reviewed yet. Our take: it means a lot of men build toward an image of what women want that comes from their feeds, not from women. The photo data above suggests the feed is off when it comes to how you show it.

What people who tried it say

A man in October 2026 said a short video of him chopping wood in a tank top got huge positive feedback on Hinge. He met his wife there, and she still brings it up almost every month. He said he was simply chopping wood, not putting on a show for the camera.
In the same thread, people told a sporty man to swap his gym flex for action shots of him playing basketball or volleyball, taken by a friend. Others said he could just write about sports in a prompt, since people will believe him.
A man in his 30s in mid October 2026 said he noticed a small rise in matches after adding a shirtless mirror selfie, and asked whether to keep it. This happens, which is why some men swear by it.
In April 2026, another man said taking out his shirtless photo actually raised his match rate.
A man in his late 30s in September 2026 said the feedback on his shirtless pictures was unanimous: no one liked them.
When a man in late October posted two shirtless mirror photos to ask which body looked better, nearly every reply said not to use either. One woman said she could tell a man was in shape with his clothes on. One said the leaner photo made him look like he was starving himself, and that she knew how hard men push to get that cut.
In a late October thread mocking "gym bros," replies were split. Some women said fit men were often the best at conversation. Others said dull chats come from every type of guy.

The harm nobody mentions

The push to look shredded for photos leads some men to cut hard, sometimes into dehydration, very low calories, or drugs. That costs sleep, mood, strength, and sometimes much more, and it can make your face look tired and drawn in the very photos you are cutting for. Our guide on extreme cutting covers the risks. A healthy, steady look in a shirt does more for you on an app than a stage lean body in a mirror.

Lesser-known tips

Wear clothes that fit. A well fitted tee or knit shows shoulders and arms without saying "look at me."
Show the sport, not the gym. A climbing, hiking, swimming, or pickup game photo says you are fit and fun. A mirror selfie only says fit.
Let someone else take it. A friend taking the shot reads as social. A mirror reads as alone.
If you keep a beach or pool shot, make sure it is in context, with other people around or a real activity, and never as your first photo.
Use your prompts. A line about your Sunday run club or your soccer league tells the same story with no risk.
Video helps if it is natural. Movement shows strength better than a pose, and the 2025 Frontiers study found video at least as good as several photos.
If you date men, women, or both, think about who you most want to reach and pick for them.

Our honest take

For straight men, the shirtless gym selfie is a bad trade. You gain a little attention from a few people and lose more from the rest, and you look less trustworthy while doing it. But do not give up on training. Strength is one of the biggest drivers of how attractive a man's body looks. The smart move is to get fit and then show it quietly, in a good shirt, doing something real.

Bottom line

Keep training, drop the mirror flex, and let fitness show in fitted clothes, action shots, and one line in your prompts. If you want to know whether your sporty photo reads as fun or as showing off, ask people who are not your friends. The Face They See lets people of the opposite gender rank your photos for free, so you can see which of your shots works before you upload it.

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