Photos and Dating
Should You Date Someone You Don't Want to Marry? Girls Gotta Eat's "Entry Level Boyfriend" Episode (Nov 2, 2026)
Should you date someone you don't want to marry? On the November 2, 2026 Girls Gotta Eat episode, hosts Ashley Hesseltine and Rayna Greenberg made the case for the "entry level boyfriend": dating people for the relationship experience instead of dropping everyone who is not marriage material. They argued you only learn some things about yourself inside a real relationship. [1] [2]
Short answer
- Their view: Yes, dating for experience is valuable, especially when you are young.
- Why: Situationships and quick cuts do not teach you how to argue, apologize or compromise.
- Our caveat: It works when you are both honest about it. It fails when one person is quietly planning a wedding.
What the episode covered
The show notes list the topics: the case for the entry level boyfriend, things you can only learn about yourself in relationships, whether "dating with intention" has made people too picky, the myth that breakups are failures, and what the legal age of marriage should be. [2] The first part of the episode is life updates, including a house sale and a rough move. This summary is based on the show notes and the YouTube transcript.
The main argument
The hosts read from a piece about the entry level boyfriend. One line stood out: the writer said she watched friends cycle through situationships that gave them "no experience in communicating, compromising, fighting, apologizing, and showing up." [1]
One host added that you think you know how you handle conflict, until it is someone you have "handed your heart over to." Friends, parents and business partners are not the same. [1]
They also pushed back on the idea that a relationship only counts if it ends in marriage. Companionship, fun, great sex and "a meaningful year or two of your life" count too. Even a toxic relationship, one host said, left good memories and lessons. [1]
The spicy part
One host said, half joking, that people should not legally be allowed to marry before 27. She said 30, then settled on 27 because listeners would push back. [1] Take that as an opinion, not a rule. Some couples who marry young do well, and they said so too. [1]
What you actually learn from an entry level relationship
Here is our list, built from their point. These are skills you cannot learn from a dating app chat.
- How you fight. Do you shut down, yell, or need space?
- How you repair. Can you say sorry first? Can you accept one?
- What you need day to day. How much alone time, how much texting, how much help.
- Your dealbreakers. You often find them by living next to them.
- That you survive a breakup. The hosts called breakups being "failures" a myth. [2]
Rules for doing it right (original)
Dating for experience can turn into wasted years. These rules keep it healthy.
- Be honest early. "I'm not thinking about marriage right now. I want something real, but I don't know where it goes." Say it before it gets serious.
- Check in every few months. Ask yourself: am I still learning and happy, or am I staying because it is easy?
- Know your clock. If you want kids by a certain age, count back. That is not unromantic. It is a plan.
- Do not move in by default. Moving in because a lease ended is how "entry level" becomes five years.
- Leave well. A kind, clear breakup is part of the experience.
When this is a bad idea
- He clearly wants marriage and you know you never will with him.
- You are staying because you are scared of being single.
- You are in your 30s, sure you want kids soon, and he is sure he does not.
In those cases, the "experience" costs the other person, or you, real time.
Is "dating with intention" making you too picky? (original)
The hosts asked this, and it is worth asking yourself. Signs your filter is helping:
- You skip men who clearly want different big things, like kids or no kids.
- You leave fast when someone is unkind.
Signs your filter is hurting:
- You cut men after one date for small things, like a so so text or the wrong shoes.
- You have a list of 20 "musts" and no one has passed in two years.
- You never get past date three, so you never learn how you act in a relationship.
A better filter: keep three true dealbreakers and five "nice to haves." Give anyone who is kind and clears the three dealbreakers at least two more dates.
How to tell him without making it weird
You do not need to say "you're my entry level boyfriend." Try: "I really like this and I want to see where it goes. I'm not in a rush to plan forever." That is honest, and it lets him say where he is too.
Quick takeaway
Girls Gotta Eat (Nov 2, 2026) argued for the "entry level boyfriend."
Real relationships teach fighting, repair and compromise that apps cannot.
Be honest early and check in every few months.
Do not drift into moving in or wasting years you need for other goals.