Best Dating App Tips From Reddit for 2027: Filtering, Premium and "What Are You Looking For?"

What dating app advice are people on Reddit actually giving for 2027? The big theme in r/OnlineDating this fall was saving your time and energy: do a short call before meeting, say clearly what you want, and judge people by actions. We read six popular threads from October and November 2026 and paraphrased the most useful tips. Many posters were men, which makes their views useful for women trying to understand the other side. These are anonymous opinions, not expert advice.

Short answer

A short phone or video call before meeting filters out most mismatches.
Ask about dealbreakers early: kids, distance, relationship goals.
Be honest about intentions, and ask what "serious" means to him.
Premium may show you to more people, but it cannot make anyone like you.
Back after a break? One short, honest line is enough.

1. How to filter matches without burning out

A late October 2026 thread asked how to cut down on draining chats and dates. [1] The top answer said a 10 minute call filters more than any amount of texting, because some people who seem great in text go flat when they have to talk. Others said if someone will not do a quick call to help you feel safe, they are not worth meeting. Asking about dealbreakers up front, like kids, schedule, distance and goals, also helped. One woman said activity dates, like bingo or a museum, showed her more personality than question lists. [1]

Our take (original): try a rule: chat a few days, call for 10 minutes, then meet for a short first date.

2. "What are you looking for?" is a fair question

A late October thread from someone new to dating said the question felt like needing a "vision statement." [2] Most replies, many from women, said it is a time saver. Women explained they ask because they want a relationship and have limited time, and do not want to spend it on someone who only wants hookups. Others suggested an honest answer: looking for a long term partner but happy to meet new people along the way. [2]

Our take (original): you can be open and still be clear. "I'm dating to find a relationship, and I like to take it slow" is a full answer.

3. How to tell early if he wants something serious

An early November thread asked how to tell if someone actually wants something serious, since every bio says "meaningful." [3] Replies were honest: there is no magic question. People said to watch actions over time. Does he show up, make plans, introduce you to friends and take responsibility? Several said to ask directly what "serious" means to him. [3]

4. Is premium worth it?

An October thread asked which premium plan is most worth paying for. [4] Opinions split. Some said paid plans show your profile to more people. Others said paying does not change whether people like you, and money is better spent on a social life offline. [4]

Our take (original): for most women, the free version is enough. Try premium for one month only if you want to see more profiles.

5. Coming back after months away

An early November thread asked what to do after leaving the app for a few months. [5] Common advice: for chats you dropped, send one short honest line, or unmatch. For new likes you never answered, just say you were off the app for a while and see if they want to chat. [5]

6. Yes, people forget who they talked to

An October thread complained that women on apps rematched and acted like they had never talked. [6] Many replies, from men and women, said both sexes do this because everyone talks to so many people. [6]

Our take (original): if a rematch happens, a light "I think we chatted before" is fine.

Copy and paste lines (original)

Asking for a call: "Want to do a quick 10 minute call this week? I like to chat before meeting."

Asking about intentions: "What are you hoping to find on here?"

Following up: "And what does serious look like for you?"

Returning after a break: "Sorry I went quiet, I was off the app for a while. Still up for chatting?"

Rematch: "Pretty sure we chatted before. Want to try again?"

A weekly app routine that avoids burnout (original)

Two short sessions a week, 15 minutes each, instead of daily swiping.
Reply in batches once a day.
Move good chats to a call within a few days.
Cap first dates at two a week.
Take a full week off every couple of months.

Profile tips that match these threads (original)

Say what you want in plain words in your bio.
Use clear, recent photos so the call or date matches what he saw.
Add one prompt that is easy to answer, like a question about food or travel.
Put a dealbreaker or two in your profile if they matter a lot, like wanting kids.

What men in these threads revealed (original)

Reading the replies from men is useful. Plenty of them treat apps as a numbers game and talk to many people at once. That is not personal, but it is a reason to move good chats forward quickly and not over invest in texting before you have met. If he is keen, he will be happy to call and make a plan. If he stalls for weeks, move on without guilt.

Quick takeaway

A 10 minute call before meeting saves hours of bad dates.

Ask about dealbreakers and intentions early. It is normal.

Judge "serious" by actions over time.

Free apps are enough for most women.

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